Street Date: May 13

Official Synopsis:
In the spirit of great horror comedies like Army of Darkness Shaun of The Dead and An American Werewolf in London comes BOTCHED a film that takes funny and gore to the next level. Having recently won best feature at the New York City Horror Film Festival the film's star Stephen Dorff (Blade World Trade Center and who is currently filming Public Enemies with Johnny Depp Christian Bale and Director Michael Mann) also took home Best Actor honors as well. Jamie Murray (Dexter and the BBC series Hustle) is also along for the ride along with an ensemble cast of memorable characters. From producer Steve Richards who also brought you The Matrix: Reloaded House on Haunted Hill and the upcoming Guy Ritchie film RocknRolla comes the story of Ritchie Donovan (Stephen Dorff) a professional thief whose luck turns from bad to worse. The only survivor from a heist that goes terribly wrong Ritchie is forced to take the rap and is sent to Russia to steal a priceless antique cross locked in a safe on the penthouse floor of a Moscow skyscraper. Unfortunately his luck runs out yet again and things rapidly go downhill. During the robbery Ritchie and his Russian accomplices are trapped by police and are forced to take hostages seeking refuge on the building's unused 13th Floor... and we all know how unlucky the number 13 is.
  
Our Take:
Stephen Dorff should be an A-List actor. There. I said it. The man has awesome screen presence and is a great actor, and while the bulk of his career has been pretty crappy I blame the studio heads more for only offering him crap than him for only accepting crap. And speaking of crap, have I mentioned Stephen Dorff’s newest movie Botched?

The movie starts out pretty slick. Dorff is presented as a suave thief who ends up in an accident thanks to his comrades that puts him in a bit of a pickle with the higher ups. But it’s at this time when the movie changes pace, tone and any coolness it once portrayed.

What follows is a laughable feast of blood and mayhem by a poor-man’s Braveheart who prances around and does pirouettes like a little fairy. The special effects are good, so I guess people will find comfort in that but that’s about all I can say. The movie turns into such a corn-fest so fast that you don’t even have time to comprehend what happened and where it all went wrong.

There are no special features included on this DVD.

I watched Botched with a friend and he put it best when he stated, “This movie looks good, like they spent a lot of money on it. How could they not know who dumb it is?” It’s a good question, but now you have no reason to use it because I’m here to warn you about just how dumb this movie gets.

Overall Picture:
Movie: D
DVD: C

- Landen Chase Pelish
Staff Writer